HOW CAN FRIENDS HELP...

A BALANCE BETWEEN COMPANIONSHIP AND PRIVACY. The bereaved need time to reflect on their feelings as well as time to share their feelings.

AN OPPORTUNITY TO EXPRESS GRIEF WITHOUT EMBARRASSMENT OR JUDGMENT. An emotionally safe environment where the bereaved can open up and express feelings if they choose.

RECOGNITION OF THE MANY SYMPTOMS THAT MAY OCCUR AS A RESULT OF INTENSE GRIEVING. Loss of sleep, appetite, strength, motivation and inconsistencies in behavior are all normal after a loss. They resemble that which accompanies a serious illness.

SUPPORT AND ASSISTANCE IN BECOMING SOCIALLY REACTIVATED. Someone who can assist them when they are ready to reenter a social world and someone who respects their need to reenter on their own time schedule. Provide an invitation with a clear indicator that refusal is acceptable.

SPECIAL ASSISTANCE WITH BUSINESS AND LEGAL MATTERS. Someone to help them think clearly to settle important issues and to plan for the immediate future.

ALLOW A FIRM FOCUS ON THE LOSS WITHOUT BEING MADE TO FEEL THEY HAVE A PHYSICAL OR MENTAL ILLNESS. It is often hard to watch someone you care about be in crisis or suffer a loss. Remember the gift of your acceptance is special.

ABOVE ALL, THE BEREAVED MAY NEED THE OPPORTUNITY TO TELL AND RE-TELL THEIR LOSS EXPERIENCE. An active listener can dramatically facilitate the healing process. Be patient and non-judgmental. Help them to draw their own conclusions. Sharing is healing.